;__im oways the starr. shinin on you on ur darkest nites. * __________________ // cindee *




the spaces btwn my fingers__;
are meant to be filled__;
by you__.


<<cindee__. >>
dhs
1b.o2 | 2b.o3 | 3i.o4
mts
6b.02
co[1]ors[4]eva
37th batch guides
P4 bougainvillea
P4sPiriT4eVabUrNin9
P6 ixora
iXorAiaNs.sHiNe
2b ohana
we [1] to [B] the best
born [2][b]eat the rest
ohana means family.
and noone gets forgotten.
nor left behind.

kisses spread harmful germs__;
but kiss me babyy__;
im vaccinated__.


<<me__. >>
purple ojo__;
soccer__; manutd__;
beckham 23__; lampard 8__;
street magic__; david blaine__;
youu and cindee forevrr__;
till end of time__;
moonnstarr__;

<<blogs galore__. >>







encore__.






anione cn catch ur eyes__;
but it takes sumone special to catch ur heart__.
lurv isnt abt findin the perfectt psrn__;
its abt seein an imperfect psrn__;
perfectly__.
lurvin sumone is one thg__;
being lurved by anothr psrn is anothr thg__;
but to be lurved by the one u lurv is everythin__.
wad if everythin u experienced__;
nvr happened__.




i lurv you cause u suck__;
and attracted me to you__;
i lurv u cause i cant haf youu__.
on a nvr endin road__;
and we're miles apart__;
i'll chase__.
lurv is whn__;
you shed tears but care for him__;
he ignores you and you stil long for him__;
he begins to lurv anothr__;
but you stil smile and say__;
"im hapi for youu__.


2bee__*
NoTe: 2b rOcK dE wORLd! (hide)
i lurv 2b like madd.

[[. 20040510 .]]

celes.huiyi.geokjoo.weiting.jerene.meiyi.yingqing.jess.lynn.peixin.yanwen.yuan
kat.jingwen.shandy.shara.shermaine.ailyn.erica.junru.cindy.verine.kimfung.jason
brandon.wenjie.darren.ivan.david.yusong.randall.roy.tingxu.zhengchen.zhuge

[[ * - - 2B'o4 - - * ]] _______________________________________________________________________________

<. s L e E p Y o L O g Y .>


"miXeD fEeLiNgS."


i m reli very sad and tired of life. thgs dun oways go rite, i hafta admit. bud wad if thgs nvr go rite? u'll get pissed, u'll fare up, u'll b as fucked up as me.

started wif going to sch for 2.4 on ^sAtUrDaY^ morning. i went to sch kinda earli, so helped my patrol mates. poor fm was sick. gurl, mus take care and get well soon. then ailyn's daddy drove us to east coast. it wasnt that bad i guess. was kinda tired at the end of it though, took quite a long tym to get back to sch for oj. went back and joined p4 in oj, was super tired.. practically dying at the end. i was kinda depressed and pissed at the end of guides on saturdae. sumone was damn blardy act seh, i cudnt stand that psrn. so wad if u cn do it? so wad? jus that fucking face of urs trying to express "yay i cn do it and u cant." wadever, i dun gif it a damn shit. will nvr ever wan to see u agn, and i was liek so stupid last tym, totalli brainless. nvr judge by its cover, its the inside that counts. finally saw that curel, evil, sickening sight of u. i'm glad i did so bfr its too late.

and then came the big blow to us. moe decided to separate us into 2 companies, 8 patrols. i cried. i jus cudnt accept the fact. i cant imagine leaving yokesan, fangming, dianne, the sec 3s and 1s. we took sum tym to get to noe each other and to accept each other for hu we were. it certainly wasnt ez, and we seriously haf feelings for each other. i luv my patrol, i luv bougainvillaea, i luv my patrol mates. why do they haf to cum and destory wad i've cum to luv? why the nid for 8 patrols? i luv guides for the way it is nw. i dunwanna split, i hate it, life is jus so curel. developing feelings for smth aint ez, i turely luv p4. p4 sPiRiT 4eVa bUrNiNg.. i tot thru abt the days we had together, whr we piaed hard thru the pt and ojs and games together. we had reli gone thru alot as a patrol. no matter hapi or sad, we had each other as our support. we depanded on each other, played crazily together, cried together.. all the difficult tyms we had together, nw cud onli be kept inside my heart. i noe this isnt aniones fault, the tchers dunwan it either. i'm jus complaining and pouring out my feelings for god to listen to. unfairness.. i luv every single thg of p4. i luv my juniors and seniors, and i even had to admit i luv my damn old blardy xiaoduixiang. life wud be meaningless hving us to split and get new patrol mates agn, the feeling, the heart will still belong as it is. human haf feelings. leaving each other for a new life is the most difficult thg to do on earth. i wish i cud hug my patrol mates and cry. we wanna write a petition, wad are the chances of them accepting it thou? feelin so depressed. sec 1s has jus handed in the proposal for their lecture bk todae. izzit of ani use nw? its totalli worthless! we're gonna split, gettit? everyone's gonna get new patrol mates, everythin gonna change, we're gonna invent new cheers over agn, we'll get new patrol shirts, new stuff, every single thg. i'm so sick of dis, everyones sad and crying. getting emotional. all our plans are ruined, we're in no mood to celebrate animore. wad we cud do nw is treasure every single second together wif one another. there'll be no jihe till june holidays. and we'll soon be in different environments wif different ppl. wadsoever. i once belong to bougainvillaea? and i'll forever belong there.. i luv you all. qinghui tzewan fiona pueisan xiuru meryl marina yokesan fangming dianne ziying wendy chinghsien jiaying yaolu charlotte. i treasure every single one of u gurls. i reli dunno wad to say, mixed feelings, and i wanna thank y'll for everything u've done for me, for p4. we rawk and p4ever.. facts cud change, bud feelings nvr change..

seeing everyone in tears, i cudnt stop myself. accept the facts gurl. life is jus likedat, theres no better tmr, theres no bright days ahead. god hasnt proven me so. went to obs wif sum sec 2s aft guides. we sat on top of the wall and monkey bar and chatted. everyone's sad and consoling each other. i wanna vent my anger, i wanna cry my guts out.

went malaysia and arrived back hm at 8+ on ^sUNdAY^ niTe. went to sum kinda restuarant for a mothers dae dinner wif granmom, my family and relatives. i enjoyed myself. since i've moved over, i hasnt seen them for a pretty long tym. my baby cousins has since grown up. i think all of us cudnt bear to leave. we were the last left at the restuarant.. it was my auntie's bdae too. my closest auntie.. we bought a cake to celebrate her bdae and mothers day. the mothers got flowers from us. i cudnt bear to leave my beloved cousin, yida. i've seen him frm the first dae he was born, carried him ard, and nw hes nearly 6 yrs old. no doubt time flies.. we got onto separate cars and left. bud bfr we got out of the buliding, my uncle's car stopped. my cousin ran out and went over to gif me a kiss, and a flower. i was reli touched, i cried. this wk has been an emotional one for me. its too much i cud take.

reached hm and piaed my sci rpt and gong han. jerene and me piaed till 3am. i was reli drained mans.. life is haish. no idea hw mani tyms i've said life is curel. jerene was sick todae, hope she get well soon. we're jus plain pathetic students..

todae ^mOndAe^ was fun.. esp at recess whr we got to play soccer.. rawks man. hmm, cant rmb wad happened, i'm tired. onli rmbed the fun parts of the day. i think i shld stop, a dammit long entry wif feelings revealed. i better stop or i'll cont crying like mad. belief it or not, i'm crying over the thgs i rote. hw silly and dumb! ahahas.. oways look on the bright side of life..

lIfE iS LiEk A bUmPY rD. wE'LL hAf tO gO tHrU tHe cOUNtLeSs uPs aNd dOwNs. i hAtE iT!!

TodaE waS a TeArY daE~ tReAsUrE wAd U hAf bFr U lOsE iT. iTs nVr tOo lATe tO sAY i lUv YoU.

^rEfLeCtiNg^ { cN tHe wUrL dUn sPiN cN tHe tHgS dUn cHaNgE? i'M gEtTiNg DiZzY aNd LoSt. }

wHY dO Y'll hAftA dEsToRy wAd i'Ve cUm tO lUv?
tErriBlE fEeLiNgS.
i'LL cRY tiLL i DiE.
i lUv tHe wAe iT iS nW.
PlS lEt iT rEMaiN aS iT iS..


;__sum ppl wait a lifetym.
for a moment lyk thiss.*

itsmaiilyfee__; maiiprerogative__.

// im oways the starr. shinin on you on ur darkest nites. *
* . . + + + + + + . ciNDee . + + + + + + . . *
Neko





my pastt__.

25.01.04 .. 27.01.04 .. 28.01.04 .. 29.01.04 .. 30.01.04 .. 31.01.04 .. 01.02.04 .. 13.02.04 .. 14.02.04 .. 17.02.04 .. 18.02.04 .. 19.02.04 .. 20.02.04 .. 21.02.04 .. 24.02.04 .. 25.02.04 .. 26.02.04 .. 28.02.04 .. 04.03.04 .. 07.03.04 .. 08.03.04 .. 14.03.04 .. 19.03.04 .. 28.03.04 .. 03.04.04 .. 14.04.04 .. 17.04.04 .. 22.04.04 .. 23.04.04 .. 24.04.04 .. 26.04.04 .. 27.04.04 .. 30.04.04 .. 01.05.04 .. 02.05.04 .. 03.05.04 .. 04.05.04 .. 05.05.04 .. 07.05.04 .. 10.05.04 .. 15.05.04 .. 23.05.04 .. 30.05.04 .. 31.05.04 .. 05.06.04 .. 09.06.04 .. 14.06.04 .. 18.06.04 .. 26.06.04 .. 01.07.04 .. 04.07.04 .. 11.07.04 .. 21.07.04 .. 25.07.04 .. 07.08.04 .. 15.08.04 .. 21.08.04 .. 26.09.04 .. 03.10.04 .. 08.10.04 .. 11.10.04 .. 16.10.04 .. 23.10.04 .. 24.10.04 .. 09.11.04 .. 10.11.04 .. 11.11.04 .. 15.11.04 .. 16.11.04 .. 17.11.04 .. 18.11.04 .. 04.12.04 .. 07.12.04 .. 11.12.04 .. 27.12.04 .. oLd.bLog ..



in the game of seduction. deres onli one rule. nvr fall in love. wad u cant haf. u cant resist_____* wud you be my moon. brgin light to ppl like you brg happiness to me?_____* the shortest word for me is 1. the sweetest word for me is love. the onli one for me is youu.____*


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